RE: Which charger?
I don't think anyone's ridiculing you, GC, and by-and-large I also share your concerns which you've expressed many times in no uncertain terms. But, clearly, not everyone is as uncomfortable about it as you and so some may want to express contrary points as vehemently as you do yours.
In the ranking of things I worry about in life, ZE battery rental issues come waaaaay low! You could also look at the whole issue in a more favourable light - I'd say the odds that Renault will sell these batteries to owners in a few years time is better than 50/50, once they 'see the light' which you say they have not yet seen. By renting the battery while you make sure it's a 'good'un', and then paying half price for it once it is 3 yrs old (for example, if it happens to work out like that), you'll be quids in over having bought outright in the first place.
Renting the battery works for me at the moment very well. Even if I owned the car, rather than PCPing it, I'd still be very happy because I am not so confident as the bullish view that these batteries won't die after 5 years.
I think some folks may be in for a rude awakening over their lovely Leaf babies in a couple of years time, and if that were to be the case Renault's strategy would then be cast in a wholly different light, with Renault being shown to be prescient and working in the interests of their customers, while Nissan squanders its customer relations and abandons owners with dead batteries.... Just wait and see, but even that's not the point, the point is that it could still go either way and battery rental is the right way to simply and completely side-step making guesses about battery life. Yes, it is a confusion to folks at the moment, but they are confused on so many things. Just look at the politicians they vote for!!!